‘Has flat buttocks,’ ‘cusses when scared’: Amazon keeps shockingly specific customer profiles


in reply to zarkanian

Mine doesn't have anything of a particularly personal nature, just obvious stuff from purchase history like:

  • Likely favors Merrell brand for outdoor footwear (I have purchased the same model of Merrell shoe several times)
  • Hikes frequently (a reasonable guess about someone who repeatedly buys hiking boots)
  • Likely has a ThinkPad laptop (I bought trackpoint caps)
  • Likely owns an Olympus camera (I bought a battery for an Olympus camera)
in reply to Zak

Yeah. Mine is really basic as well. It can be summed up as has kids, pets and a car.

The weirdest thing I see is "frequently repairs small engines"

I replaced the carb on my lawn mower last year. It's the only part I order from Amazon because I'm lazy and wanted an prebuilt carb. I hardly call that frequent but maybe it's a low bar.

in reply to ayyy

Nah. I don't need to know that when I can make my own conferences about where they got this information from.

I have a tile bathroom. Hanging stuff in there is a nightmare. I also have used those adhesive strips to mount things to the back of my TV and to my toolbox.

My brother loses/breaks chargers like it's going out of style so I buy him on every few months.

The lack of information there is kind of weird given how old the account is. I was expecting a lot of stuff and got basically nil. Granted it's not like I use the account much, but I've had it since college when you could buy used books there.

in reply to ayyy
The items that I own from them are fine. I don't really buy into all the like... Home improvement side of their business stuff. No vacuums, power you whole house power supplies, speakers, ear buds, etc. I'm probably missing a lot of the picture as far as their brand enshittification is concerned.
in reply to zarkanian

Mine is pretty meh. Gets a lot right, but thinks I have a dog and I prefer zigbee. I have a cat (that I've bought dog accessories for) and prefer Z wave, but usually buy those things elsewhere.

Most of the things it has are directly related to a single purchase that I remember. It thinks I like a certain brand of monitor because I bought two of them for secondary monitors once. They are no-name monitors and I could not care less about the brand. It's pretty basic shit. I could probably write the algorithm for it.

in reply to zarkanian

Mine is pretty straightforward, "builds electronics" "has precision tools" "likely has a french press" (I do, I bought it on Amazon), "prioritizes high-speed data transfer", "Probably has a computer system with internal expansion" (I bought an NVMe SSD from Amazon once), "Likely lives in (the town in my saved shipping address)"

So surveillance. Much sleuthing.

in reply to Captain Aggravated

It's a lot bigger than just this though, because they buy data broker info, which isn't included.

I once read a piece in Harper's Magazine, they bought these data brokers' bullshit and looked at their own profiles, and they were very wrong on a great many things, wrongly labeling people as gay, (facebook tried showing me gay ads at one point,) and a host of other ill informed conclusions about us.

Keep in mind, the feds, and maybe states now, buy this information to use against us. We should have some rights, but we don't.

in reply to Tikiporch
Someone in the meeting was like “Okay, but what if the purchaser is a sugar daddy? Or they are buying goods to a blind shipper to evade export bans?”
And that’s likely how “Technically correct, but kind of annoying Terry” got his hyper-specific nickname.
Esta entrada fue editada (ayer, 6:15)
in reply to frongt
Considering that I haven't purchased anything from Amazon in almost a year (and the few things that I do purchase from there are generally game controllers anyway), Amazon barely knows a thing about me, besides of "Gravitates toward compact, low-cost functional components", "Favors multi-platform and cross-device compatible accessories", and "Plays fighting games with specialized hardware".
in reply to zarkanian

Seems to only work on Amazon.com. My .ca info isnt used it. It says the following though:

"Make Amazon even more personal to you

Your other AI assistants have learned about you. Bring that knowledge here for an even more personalized experience.

Import
Not right now"

I think I'll go chuck my computer and iot devices into a dumpster now.

in reply to zarkanian
Mine is pretty boring. Honestly, I imagine Amazon has a much deeper profile for us hidden away and this is the one they wanted us to find to diffuse our suspicions of being constantly spied on... Seriously, I bet me TV knows more about me than that list.
in reply to Crozekiel
I don't think it's that elaborate of a conspiracy. The "deeper" profile "hidden away" is just not in plain English. They probably had to do extra processing to produce the neat human interpretable data. I'm guessing the real purpose of this is getting the humans to look at it and correct the mistakes because a lot of people are dumb enough to do just that.
in reply to IamMoonPie

Because Amazon wiped out what Walmart and other big box stores didn’t kill in the first round. Sometimes there’s literally no place else to get what I need, not even order it in to a local store. On top of that, Google search for products is so wrecked that the choices it returns are amazon links, or links to websites that also provide amazon links to the same products. It’s fucked up.

(FWIW I do buy local or direct from businesses other than Amazon when possible, but it’s simply not possible all the time)

in reply to RememberTheApollo_

Or… and here me out here, maybe just do a little more research and purchase online from companies that AREN’T Amazon.

I get we all want shopping to be easier, but that’s no excuse to fund the facist machine that is Amazon.

I’m going to hold your hand when I say this because I know this will be hard to hear, but it’s not just about you and your “convenience” buddy.

I’m disabled and can’t drive anywhere, and I somehow manage to figure it out. Sometimes it takes a while, but I can do it.

What could you possibly be shopping for that’s only on Amazon? And if said company is only on Amazon— why would you want to support them anyway?

All I’m saying is, if an idiot like me can do it, so can you.

in reply to IamMoonPie

The point I'm making that you are making it seem llke it's a lot easier that it is to do the right thing. Not everyone has the time, money, and mental energy that you have to seek out more wholesome alternatives. Sometimes you just need something, and you need it now with minimal friction. You are very lucky and privileged that you have the time and patience to put up with the hassle of doing business with a small company. There are way too many scammers and unreliable merchants out there and it's a game of Whack-A-Mole separating the legit small businesses from the bullshitters.

I get where you're coming from and try my best not to fund the fascist machine, but I'm only human, and sometimes I just want to take the easy route and order something off of Amazon. And there's nothing wrong with that, because I know my heart is in the right place.

in reply to Psythik

nah fuck that, the episode you're talking about is where they lost me.

"There's no ethical consumption under capitalism... therefore we're going to rewrite the rules of the cosmos to give you a pass for it, and now you're not obliged to fight it any more. You can go back to being happy little consumers now, all your guilt is absolved. Fremulon. NBCUniversal, a Comcast company."

Esta entrada fue editada (ayer, 10:17)
in reply to skisnow

I'm not talking about a specific episode—I'm way too ADHD for that—rather the message of the show in general. So knock it off with the strawman argument.

Reread my reply to the other person, and you'll understand the point I'm trying to make. Capitalism makes it impossible to be a perfect person, so until the system changes, do the best you can in the meantime.

in reply to IamMoonPie
maybe just do a little more research and purchase online from companies that AREN’T Amazon.


I have done this, ordered from the company’s website, and still got the stuff shipped from an Amazon warehouse. I think the most recent one was an Otterbox phone case. It’s been a while because I don’t order much stuff shipped to me unless I can’t find what I need locally.

in reply to WindyRebel
This has also been my experience. If i order something off eBay, there's a decent chance it's going to arrive in an Amazon box, delivered by an Amazon driver. I just had this happen the other day, decided to try an eBay seller and avoid Amazon. Sure enough it ended up being a shipment directly from Amazon through the eBay sellers account.
in reply to TankovayaDiviziya

I live in Finland and have managed to always find an alternative. Ireland gets way more shipping options than Finland. You're literally just not searching hard enough.

1) don't use Google. It always only tries to give regional search options. Use Startpage and change the region.

2) search in a different country's language. If searching in Poland for example, search in Polish.

And heck, if you somehow still can't find what you need from those stores, just look at China - EU shops. Most of Amazon's shit is from China anyway, so might as well avoid the middleman.

in reply to Lumisal
  1. I don't use Google.
  2. I went to a Polish site and they don't deliver to Ireland.


You're literally just not searching hard enough.


That's fair but now you see why there isn't a European Amazon? Amazon makes things convenient. They operate on a single language and have good localised pages for many parts of the world. I could have my Firefox browser translate but it's still done awkwardly. Europe doesn't offer an alternate Amazon because of multiple languages and different structures because each countries do their own. The closest rival is Wildberries but there is sanction on Russia.

in reply to TankovayaDiviziya
in reply to Lumisal

I never said Google, not sure what you're trying to read. I use Duckduckgo but I admit it's getting terrible over the years and I might start using Startpage because I think it's slightly better.

The Amazon pages have bettee localisation and better translation to many languages, unlike Firefox translation which I still find clumsy.

Does it take more time to give something without Amazon? Yes. Does it take a lot more time though? Not really. In the end, it really comes down to just not caring enough about fascism/climate/corruption.


That's a fair enough argument.

in reply to IamMoonPie

Because it's almost always superior, if you need things from more than one "niche". Specialty shops only make sense if you have a big order in that niche, like building a new PC. If you want a hard drive, some TCG card sleeves, some zero cal food products, and wanna top up on boxer shorts, Amazon is just too far ahead.

I have tried other "everything" retailers in Europe, like Otto, but their selection for everything is tiny. Ironically, it's not tiny well selected, well known european brands. It's still filled with Chinese shovel ware.

in reply to BrainBow65

There is a current proposal by the Irish presidency of the EU commission that would allow a GDPR exception for anything relating to AI.

Hope it dies in parliament. But never forget that the rights that do exist in the EU are constantly under attack by lobby interests.

in reply to zarkanian

I was expecting to be horrified but mine actually made me feel pretty good lol

I prefer Anker USB devices, I grow plants as a hobby, and I consistently maintain dog supplies!

The only thing it got wrong is it thinks I have kids. But I guess I only really use amazon to get stuff for my dog and my sister's kids so that's no surprise

in reply to zarkanian
Hahahaha... now I'm kind of sad I deleted my account after Amazon kept trying to scam me by offering me free Amazon prime. They would give me a month free, then like 10 days, then only like 3 days, hoping I would forget and have to be charged for it. When they finally caught me out, I just told them to fuck off and deleted my account.
Never liked their other predatory practices, like how they would plagiarise and sell existing products for dirt cheap and label them Amazon Basics... And then when companies would go out of business. They would bring up the prices. I guess you don't get that wealthy without stepping on a lot of people.
in reply to Rekorse
I have one collecting dust. I could delete it but it never gets used and they'll profile me anyway. Last purchase was in February 2020. I've always hated amazon because of where I grew up and other reasons, but seeing how warehouse workers were treated during the pandemic was the tipping point for me. Convenience is like a drug, and going cold turkey was pretty fucking hard honestly. But it's become easier over time. I will never give another red fucking cent to Borzo.
in reply to Rekorse
Honestly I wish I didn't. I don't have a google account. Don't have any Meta accounts. Don't have accounts for basically anything I'm not functionally REQUIRED to have (banking for example). But Amazon is hard to avoid. I do a lot of buying in person, but in person shopping is just horrible these days. You need to find something specific and you are screwed. I do try to find other places online to get something when I can but a lot of times I just have to fall back to amazon. Maybe part of it is just the area I'm in though. Tons of the more specialty stores here have closed down. We don't even have an electronics store anymore after Best Buy closed.
in reply to XiJinpingStanAccount
I've had the privilege to live in economically robust (relatively speaking lol) environments, which has helped a lot in my mission to avoid them. I've been able to do it but I've also been lucky. Keep the fire alive, keep searching for alternatives. But damn do I feel for your situation, not even having a basic electronics type store is pretty rough.
in reply to Rekorse

I've never felt any need to have an Amazon account, there you go. Never bought anything for them or even found anything that I wanted to buy from them.

It helps that they were so late to market in NZ that they still aren't really that commonly used here. There's better local alternatives which cost less

I do use AWS for work though (but we're gradually shifting off them, there's way cheaper alternatives these days)

in reply to zarkanian

The one that got me was "probably has a husband who doesn't like lotion"

I always figured Amazon knew the most about me because what you buy probably says more about you than what you search. Like Google may think I'm a raving lunatic but Amazon knows I am a householder and what I use. So I was honestly pretty relieved most of it was very general except that oddball example above.

in reply to zarkanian
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I hope everyone has added this to their file about Jeff Bezos

Amazon founder Jeff Bezos had Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell attend his private, invitation-only, weekend at a resort he rented out. Bezos also has numerous private dinners with Epstein. They were good friends.

in reply to cardboardboxfort
Ah good. He was in goods with the secret police that's two thousand or so years old that's described in the New Testament at an eighth grade reading level, that is a good thing, and I am glad. For additional clarification, I want to make sure that you have understood that I have called out the farce of the police state that is using my still-living and very real bud Jeff's reputation as a scaffold for thems child hooker things and trafficking and the like, but y'know, we all know how engrossed you are in that nine-figure industry as you are, cardboardboxfort. We see your search history over here in Quantico, or wherever tf you think I am.
in reply to zarkanian
Mine seemed to have pulled knowledge based on things I've mentioned in reviews. Otherwise it just seems to be pretty mundane for things like order history...yep, someone with a dog profile picture and who occasionally orders dog products may in fact, have a dog. The thing it gets tripped up on is things ordered for my kids or relatives from my account (but aren't necessarily gifts or shipped elsewhere)