It's kinda crazy. I'm 41 now and 10 or 15 years ago i often read that people said that they have no friend. And i thought that's more of a joke, like people knline joke about how they wanna kill themselves or whatever, because i had multiple friend groups, and would see a lot of them almost daily.
Suddenly, people moved away, were in relationships, had kids, died or you just realized that you are not friends anymore.
I talked to my girlfriend about our wedding and she asked me who i would invite. I had to think for a bit and said, i dunno, my sister... And that's pretty much it, since i marry my best and kind of only friend. Then she thought about it and said: my parents, and... Fuck, i don't have any friends either, except you.
We were the same. It would have been 20 people at the most, that's with their families. We said "fuck it" and went to the courthouse. We were going to use wedding money for a honeymoon instead, but then the 2008 crash happened and we had to use it to get by almost a year of unemployment. It's crazy how easily one becomes isolated.
I'd say I have a good handful. I'm not good at getting close to people, so some toe the line for me between acquaintance and friend. For a numerical, I suppose if we count those toeing the line - maybe a dozen or so? Maybe 15?
I've been very lucky as an adult to find a lot of good people. 99% of them are from playing TTRPGs online.
It's a bit tricky nowadays to find a solid game. There's plenty of LFG things on either Reddit or any of the discords for your desired TTRPG - usually numbers favor DnD5e, but there's a fair few on Pathfinder 2e nowadays too.
However, the best luck I've had in more recent years has been on startplaying.games - where you can find a paid DM/GM. (Not a shill, just what I have personally experienced)
I could go into what I believe the benefits of a paid vs unpaid game are, but that's a lot of extra for just this.
Esta entrada fue editada (lunes, 12 de octubre de 2026, 4:02)
My friend and my wife. I'm not a disagreeable person. I have a fair few friendly acquaintances, but I'm not willing to put in the energy for more actual friends
2 very close friends, my wife that's my friend, another close friend, and at least another dozen I would consider friends. Then there are many acquaintances that I enjoy associating with, but we're not a as close and don't talk frequently. Also a brother, sister, and BiL that I'm close with and do friend things with.
Acquaintances I enjoy being around at social functions: maybe 50
None of the categories count my kids, other people’s kids, or family except for my wife
Also, I think my numbers are inflated because of how many bands I was in when I was younger. The community of that music scene was something I’m not sure I’ll ever see again. But I do play dnd every week, which helps too.
Esta entrada fue editada (lunes, 12 de octubre de 2026, 2:43)
I'm pretty similar but I would switch the answers on the first and third question. I have a lot more people I talk to quite frequently than people I would be interested in hanging out with.
I realize not close ones, but my partner is for sure my #1. Hard to rely on the one for everything, and social anxiety trying to make new friends as I get older is even more daunting. Lesson to the youth - take care to have friends as you age!
Not sure at this point but it is getting less and less. It becomes harder to hold them together as time goes. I know I need to exert more effort but it sucks if your friends don't reach out at all. Starting transition, while being the best decision of my life, has really not helped in that regard. Although I can be happy to only have lost one friend directly from that.
Many comments mention "people i talk to every day". Is that really a common thing? Literally daily? I have a couple good friends, but definitely none I talk to daily 😅
For me it is more about being friends for many years and always having a good time when we meet. At most I chat 2-3 times a week with some.
3 good ones and maybe 5 outside of that. I'm pretty bad at keeping up with them honestly. Sometimes I message them and they're like yo its been 6 months where you been, yeah sorry I got obsessed with something and forgot the world exists.
I'm 53 and I've outlived many. The few I have I don't care to be around at all. (southern drinking buddy is maga & racist af, hear from him now maybe every 5 years)
So, 0 not counting family and their kids. I'm just content these days to watch family grow up.
edit: The biggest change to social interactions I've just noticed happens to be due to the legalization of weed, before that I'd have to keep a whole fucking network of associates on hand lol
Esta entrada fue editada (jueves, 15 de octubre de 2026, 1:41)
TheOSINTguy
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageKyrias
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageDepending on your definition.
Probably dozens.
People I talk to daily shooting the shit? Probably 10 or so.
orenj [he/they]
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageVoluntarySpud
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageMalica
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageRozz
in reply to Malica • • • Public MessageFatVegan
in reply to Malica • • • Public MessageIt's kinda crazy. I'm 41 now and 10 or 15 years ago i often read that people said that they have no friend. And i thought that's more of a joke, like people knline joke about how they wanna kill themselves or whatever, because i had multiple friend groups, and would see a lot of them almost daily.
Suddenly, people moved away, were in relationships, had kids, died or you just realized that you are not friends anymore.
I talked to my girlfriend about our wedding and she asked me who i would invite. I had to think for a bit and said, i dunno, my sister... And that's pretty much it, since i marry my best and kind of only friend. Then she thought about it and said: my parents, and... Fuck, i don't have any friends either, except you.
Malica
in reply to FatVegan • • • Public MessageSuck_on_my_Presence
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageI'd say I have a good handful. I'm not good at getting close to people, so some toe the line for me between acquaintance and friend. For a numerical, I suppose if we count those toeing the line - maybe a dozen or so? Maybe 15?
I've been very lucky as an adult to find a lot of good people. 99% of them are from playing TTRPGs online.
DominusOfMegadeus
in reply to Suck_on_my_Presence • • • Public MessageSuck_on_my_Presence
in reply to DominusOfMegadeus • • • Public MessageIt's a bit tricky nowadays to find a solid game. There's plenty of LFG things on either Reddit or any of the discords for your desired TTRPG - usually numbers favor DnD5e, but there's a fair few on Pathfinder 2e nowadays too.
However, the best luck I've had in more recent years has been on startplaying.games - where you can find a paid DM/GM. (Not a shill, just what I have personally experienced)
I could go into what I believe the benefits of a paid vs unpaid game are, but that's a lot of extra for just this.
dohpaz42
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageYou’re doing better than I am.
I know people. We get along. But friends? Nope.
slowmolaggins
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageSailor Anarres
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public Message/home/pineapplelover
in reply to Sailor Anarres • • • Public MessageBassTurd
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageMeetMeAtTheMovies [they/them]
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessagePeople I talk to every day: 2
People I feel able to confide in regularly: 3
People I occasionally invite over for a party: 15
Acquaintances I enjoy being around at social functions: maybe 50
None of the categories count my kids, other people’s kids, or family except for my wife
Also, I think my numbers are inflated because of how many bands I was in when I was younger. The community of that music scene was something I’m not sure I’ll ever see again. But I do play dnd every week, which helps too.
fuckwit_mcbumcrumble
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageClose friends that I talk to almost daily? Like 4
Friends that I talk to about once a week or more? Like 10-15
Friends that I rarely talk to, but would hang out with time permitting? Like 30. Most are co workers that I’ll go drinking with after work.
ximtor
in reply to fuckwit_mcbumcrumble • • • Public MessageVespair
in reply to fuckwit_mcbumcrumble • • • Public MessageMost Popular Person on Lemmy here to flex on the rest of us, damn
(I kid, I'm just jealous of your social circle)
Hudell
in reply to fuckwit_mcbumcrumble • • • Public MessageCarlos Solís
in reply to BlackSnack • • Public Messageninjaphysics
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageRandom_Character_A
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageCasuls_Die_Thrice
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageI have 9; 5 are uni classmates I’m on a 2-semester project with, and the other 4 are:
-A retired public-sector official old enough to be my grandmother
-A semi-retired realtor also old enough to be my grandmother
-Another realtor who used to work for the first realtor but now is an exec at another company
-His notary-public and possibly-also-CIA longtime boyfriend
All of the latter 4 are older than my parents.
Lowleekun [comrade/them, she/her]
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public Messageximtor
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageMany comments mention "people i talk to every day". Is that really a common thing? Literally daily? I have a couple good friends, but definitely none I talk to daily 😅
For me it is more about being friends for many years and always having a good time when we meet. At most I chat 2-3 times a week with some.
Fizz
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public Messagerants_unnecessarily
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageOne of them lives abroad and the other two I see every few months.
ExistentialNightmare
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public Message1
And it is only because of his mother dying that brought us back in touch with each other after many years seperated.
grrgyle
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageGonzoAtBarstow
in reply to BlackSnack • • • Public MessageI'm 53 and I've outlived many. The few I have I don't care to be around at all. (southern drinking buddy is maga & racist af, hear from him now maybe every 5 years)
So, 0 not counting family and their kids. I'm just content these days to watch family grow up.
edit: The biggest change to social interactions I've just noticed happens to be due to the legalization of weed, before that I'd have to keep a whole fucking network of associates on hand lol